A small thing that helps
Learning intention By the end of this lesson, students can describe everyday kindness and suggest a response that may bring some relief without trying to fix everything.
- Time
- 42 minutes
- How the room works
- Groups of three or four
- You need
- Fictional scenario slips, paper and pens
- Opens with
- One breath for you, one for them
Before you start
Keep all scenarios fictional and the self-directed writing private. Redirect discussion that names classmates.
Read the full safeguarding note Adapting it for your class A note home for this lesson
Open this drawing in the library
Why this matters
We rarely know everything another person is carrying. Kindness is an ordinary response that says their experience matters, whether through attention, practical help or a respectful gesture. It can be offered to ourselves too, especially when the usual inner response is harsh.
Skill in context Feeling concern for your own or another person's difficulty and wishing to bring relief.
On the skill of compassionTry the interactive practiceTry it yourself first
“Where It Hurts” takes a few quiet minutes, just for you, before you teach it. Nothing you write in it is saved or sent.
Open with “One breath for you, one for them”
5 minUse One breath for you, one for them as a quiet practice. Students may breathe normally, keep both wishes for themselves or simply listen.
Take one comfortable breath and offer yourself something you need today, such as patience, steadiness or a little room.
Bring to mind someone who could use a kind day, without saying who they are.
As you breathe out normally, offer them a quiet wish in words that feel natural to you.
Repeat once or twice, keeping the wish with yourself whenever that feels safer.
Listen for Do not look for kindness in students' faces or ask who they pictured. Keep ordinary breathing and quiet observation available.
Teacher explanation
10 minKindness can be simple: noticing someone, including them, checking what they need or making one part of the day easier. It does not place one person above another or assume we know what is best.
A kind intention still needs consent and judgement. Sometimes help is welcome; sometimes a person wants company, space or support from someone with more responsibility. We can ask rather than guess, and we can care without taking on a role that is not safe for us.
Questions for the room
- What small actions can make an ordinary day easier for another person?
- Why might someone hold back from offering or receiving kindness?
- How can we find out whether a person wants listening, practical help or space?
What might help?
18 min- Give each group several fictional situations, such as a student receiving a disappointing result, sitting alone, regretting an argument or arriving after a difficult morning.
- For each situation, list responses that may minimise, embarrass or take over, and explain why they may not help.
- Write one respectful question that could help the character say what they need.
- Offer two possible responses: one small practical action and one way of staying alongside without fixing.
- Add a scenario in which the character speaks harshly to themselves. Students privately draft what they would say to a friend in the same position.
- Gather one response from each group and notice how the most useful ideas leave room for the other person's choice.
Private reflection
6 minThink of one small kindness you could offer to yourself or someone else in the next few days. What would make it caring, realistic and free of pressure?
How they reflect Private journal
Closing
3 minWe will not always know what another person is carrying, and we will not always be able to change it. We can still ask, and offer one small thing with care.
Safeguarding
Keep all scenarios fictional and the self-directed writing private. Redirect discussion that names classmates. Make clear that students should involve a trusted adult when someone may be unsafe, and follow the setting's safeguarding procedures if a concern arises.
If something a young person says gives you concern, follow your setting’s usual safeguarding route. This is not yours to carry alone.
Adapting it
In other settings
Take this lesson with you
The plan is editable, so you can change the names, the examples and the timings to fit the young people in front of you.
To teach
For students
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