First attempts

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Card 51 of 52

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Opener · 4 min

First attempts

Think back to one attempt this year that did not go as you hoped, perhaps a mark, a try-out or a plan that changed.

Ask yourself quietly what you know now because you made that attempt, and what you might choose differently another time.

An attempt that did not work can still give you information, even while the disappointment or the cost is real.

You do not need to share the memory or turn it into a good story. Just notice whether the question changes how you hold it.

Recipes for Wellbeing · CC BY-NC 4.0

Illustration by RecipesforWellbeing.org, CC BY-NC 4.0

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Think back to one attempt this year that did not go as you hoped, perhaps a mark, a try-out or a plan that changed.

Ask yourself quietly what you know now because you made that attempt, and what you might choose differently another time.

An attempt that did not work can still give you information, even while the disappointment or the cost is real.

You do not need to share the memory or turn it into a good story. Just notice whether the question changes how you hold it.

That’s the practice.

Listen for Make the privacy of the reflection clear before students choose a memory, and do not look for a visible sign that the reframe worked.

The skill of sense-making. Deepening understanding of something difficult or complicated to construct meaning from what feels chaotic.

What complex issue in your work or life could benefit from deeper understanding? What helps you find clarity when things feel confusing?

Try the interactive practice on this skill

Think back to one small attempt in your work that did not go as you hoped, such as a meeting, a pitch or a plan that changed.

Ask yourself quietly what you know now because you made that attempt, and what you might choose differently another time.

An attempt that did not work can still give you information, even while the disappointment or the cost is real.

You do not need to share the memory or turn it into a good story. Just notice whether the question changes how you hold it.

That’s the practice.

Watch for anyone who goes very still, tearful or far away. Do not single them out. Offer a break, or speak to them quietly afterwards.

The skill of sense-making. Deepening understanding of something difficult or complicated to construct meaning from what feels chaotic.

What complex issue in your work or life could benefit from deeper understanding? What helps you find clarity when things feel confusing?

Try the interactive practice on this skill

Safeguarding

Nothing here asks a young person to share something painful, or to perform being well. Taking part silently is taking part.

“Pass” is always allowed. If something a young person says gives you concern, follow your setting’s usual safeguarding route. This is not yours to carry alone.

Care and safety

Nothing here asks anyone to share something painful or to look well. Taking part silently is taking part, and passing is always allowed.

If someone is struggling, follow the care route your group agreed in its first session. This is not yours to carry alone.

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The skill of sense-making

Deepening understanding of something difficult or complicated to construct meaning from what feels chaotic.

Hear this skill read aloud

Read the whole post Try the interactive practice Reflect on this skill for yourself

Adapting it

Ages 13 to 15: If students need a lower-stakes way in, use the example of learning a game level through repeated tries.
Ages 16 to 18: During results season, acknowledge that an experience can teach something and still hurt or carry real consequences.